MY CROSS(t)

With awe..i went for cell the next day after GOD msg on the door:)

Before the session..i swinged by the grotto of Mother Mary and she said something which puzzled me. Tonight you will receive something in your hands.

Without expecting anything..i went for the intercessory prayers together with sury,eugene,abi and elaine. I saw a beautiful vision for YAM. Mother mary carried a bouquet of flowers and presented it to JESUS..HE took it with great care and planted each flowers in the garden bed of HIS KINGDOM!

Feeling so loved by GOD..i went for the session. When worship started..i suddenly didnt feel like praising GOD. I wept and wept. Its soo weird. Then i saw the vision where i was in the tunnel again. This time, i had the two cards on my hands. On my left was soo bright and on my right was soo dark.

A annoying voice say..get out of this place..leave this place!All of them are crazy..see..dun you miss your past?ure so free then..leave..

All my past memories started flooding in.

I cried even harder.

Den I heard Jesus voice speak...MY Love...come..follow me!

Just then, i saw jesus open the door which i felt soo happy and light yesterday. And i saw everyone in the ministry i know cheering me on to come with them.

then the stupid annoying voice told me to leave again.

i opened my eyes and i saw right in front of me..(so incidentally..a door and a cross above it.)

I wanted to get out for i can no longer bear the sound of everyone praising GOD.

I left..and thankfully i didnt take my bag along if not i would have drove home. and i dont wish to return to the worship room. So i went to ado room. and I broke down. I asked GOD..

WHY WHY WHY..why issit that i have listened to u i have to suffer..WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY

I wailed and screamed in my heart. GOD spoke to me and say..quiet urself down

I yelled...NONONONO..stop talking to me stop showing me things..I DUN WANT ANYTHING.I JUST WANT THE GUY.

GOD continued. Just focus on the darkness in front of you and quiet urself down.

I did..and after awhile. I saw the most amazing sight ever.

I was at the entrance of the door Jesus opened for me.

In this place, i saw many people carrying their own crosses..people falling people climbing and picking themselves up. But still they held on and Jesus was there to lift them up and help them along.

And then I saw Jesus standing beside me and saying, my dear girl, this is your cross(it is pink colour by the way!!sweet!) are you willing to pick up ur cross?

I struggled and thought for the longest time before GOD said..
With this sacrifice you make, i will bless you family, all the relationship you ever have or will ever have and all your friends.you may think your sacrifice is small but to me its big and i love you.

With that i said my YES to GOD

As i was about to leave the room, i saw jane who asked me to sit down with her. she placed her hands on my heart and prayed for me. At this moment, my hands which were placed open on my knees felt soo heavy and i saw my pink cross on my hands.

God ended by saying..the broken heart you have i will restore!

PRAISE THE LORD!