The week went by with pain but i held on to GOD's amazing grace. And the next mon, i was in the same place:ado room...just spending quiet time with HIM.
I left the room feeling light and recharged. But the guy had to call me.
He called and say that maybe we should give ourselves another chance.Again my heart skipped a beat. But i know that GOD has already said NO, he is not the man for you.
We continued to converse on the phone, sms for almost 4 days. Its the greatest temptation to forgo whatever GOD say and just return to him. Its FOUR FORCEFUL DAYS!for i simply cannot make up my mind!
I shared with a few of u..:)and its amazing how all of ur presence helped me through this time. After speaking to the guy for almost 1 hour one night, i was pretty convinced i will return to him but i told him i needed to pray before anything happens.
That very night, i prayed:" Lord, open the doors you want to open and close the door you want to close for me." And i saw..myself walking down a empty street..suddenly a huge crowd of people surrounded me and i was in a dating reality gameshow.
Men were on stage and the crowd was saying..choose this..nono..choose that.
Sheeshh..i thought to myself.
Its so annoying..pls leave me alone!
Just then I saw jesus walking towards me. On his hands..was a guy.
I cannot see the feature of this person..and i heard GOD say..GOD GIVES
I thanked GOD for speaking to me and went to sleep..still not sure what is the answer.
The next day, the guy called again. Strangly our conversation became very heated. He didnt understand why i seemed to be forcing him to go to church or cell groups. But to me all i wish is for a man who can loves GOD.
If one does not know the love of GOD, he/she can never truly love someone.
Basically..the ending was tragic and extremely fired up. Hurting words continued to flow and i felt so small. I dunno what was going on. Why did things have to end this way. I kept on accusing myself. I spoke to gavin and i told him..i had enough of GOD...i want to leave church..i want to leave cell..i dun need all these. And i decided i shld just call the guy and apologise for my nonsense behaviour.
Before i could dial his no. GOD spoke to me.
WAIT..go to adoration room after work and the answer will be revealed to you.
i was quite apprehensive of going but i had to as my car was parked there. So i went and i just ask..GODDD WHATSSSS YOURRR ANSWWWERRRRR...SPPPEAAAAKKK
As i quietened myself, i saw myself walking into a tunnel.
Half way, i met a old man and he said..WAIT I have something for you
huh was my reply.
He took out two cards.
one empty and one with a cross on it. he said..take ur pick!
i immediately took the one with the cross.
you have the ANSWER.
No way...i dont understand.
Now GOD said.."look closely at the cross."
i looked and saw a door ...i opened it and went to a place where i felt soo light and free and soo happy. and i closed the door.
God went on to ask me.." does the guy u like love me?does the guy u like want to know me?"
no i replied.
Now look at the empty card..see if there is any door?
OF course not!i answered.
And GOD ended by saying..then just like this empty card..there will not be any opening there will also be no end.
AMEN!
I left the room feeling light and recharged. But the guy had to call me.
He called and say that maybe we should give ourselves another chance.Again my heart skipped a beat. But i know that GOD has already said NO, he is not the man for you.
We continued to converse on the phone, sms for almost 4 days. Its the greatest temptation to forgo whatever GOD say and just return to him. Its FOUR FORCEFUL DAYS!for i simply cannot make up my mind!
I shared with a few of u..:)and its amazing how all of ur presence helped me through this time. After speaking to the guy for almost 1 hour one night, i was pretty convinced i will return to him but i told him i needed to pray before anything happens.
That very night, i prayed:" Lord, open the doors you want to open and close the door you want to close for me." And i saw..myself walking down a empty street..suddenly a huge crowd of people surrounded me and i was in a dating reality gameshow.
Men were on stage and the crowd was saying..choose this..nono..choose that.
Sheeshh..i thought to myself.
Its so annoying..pls leave me alone!
Just then I saw jesus walking towards me. On his hands..was a guy.
I cannot see the feature of this person..and i heard GOD say..GOD GIVES
I thanked GOD for speaking to me and went to sleep..still not sure what is the answer.
The next day, the guy called again. Strangly our conversation became very heated. He didnt understand why i seemed to be forcing him to go to church or cell groups. But to me all i wish is for a man who can loves GOD.
If one does not know the love of GOD, he/she can never truly love someone.
Basically..the ending was tragic and extremely fired up. Hurting words continued to flow and i felt so small. I dunno what was going on. Why did things have to end this way. I kept on accusing myself. I spoke to gavin and i told him..i had enough of GOD...i want to leave church..i want to leave cell..i dun need all these. And i decided i shld just call the guy and apologise for my nonsense behaviour.
Before i could dial his no. GOD spoke to me.
WAIT..go to adoration room after work and the answer will be revealed to you.
i was quite apprehensive of going but i had to as my car was parked there. So i went and i just ask..GODDD WHATSSSS YOURRR ANSWWWERRRRR...SPPPEAAAAKKK
As i quietened myself, i saw myself walking into a tunnel.
Half way, i met a old man and he said..WAIT I have something for you
huh was my reply.
He took out two cards.
one empty and one with a cross on it. he said..take ur pick!
i immediately took the one with the cross.
you have the ANSWER.
No way...i dont understand.
Now GOD said.."look closely at the cross."
i looked and saw a door ...i opened it and went to a place where i felt soo light and free and soo happy. and i closed the door.
God went on to ask me.." does the guy u like love me?does the guy u like want to know me?"
no i replied.
Now look at the empty card..see if there is any door?
OF course not!i answered.
And GOD ended by saying..then just like this empty card..there will not be any opening there will also be no end.
AMEN!
No comments:
Post a Comment